The ADHD safety net hiding inside a kink power dynamic | Sorry, I Missed This

Kink isn’t required to get something real out of a power dynamic. And for ADHD brains, it might be more than you’d expect
Sex and relationship coach Amanda Dames — The Kink Consultant — joins the show to talk about power dynamics and what dominance and submission can actually offer neurodivergent relationships once the stigma gets stripped away. Amanda and Cate start with the basics: what a power dynamic is, why it’s a negotiated role-play and not a real transfer of power, and how submission can function as agency rather than its opposite.
From there, the conversation moves into what this looks like day to day — including a partner who quietly set household rules that ended up calming years of ADHD-driven chaos. And then into harder territory: the difference between structure that helps and control that doesn’t, how to tell the two apart, and what aftercare (a kink community staple) can offer any couple, kinky or not, after a hard moment.
For more on this topic
Watch: Kink, BDSM, and ADHD | Sorry, I Missed This
Watch: Why neurodivergent women can’t stop reading smut and romantasy | Sorry, I Missed This
Watch: Why good sex can make your ADHD brain spiral | Sorry, I Missed This
For a transcript and more resources, visit Sorry, I Missed This on Understood.org. You can also email us at [email protected].
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