Your Church Was Built for a Family That Is Disappearing

91% of pastors are married. Only 46% of the adults they're trying to reach are.
Today, we'll unpack how the American family has changed - and two simple exercises to spot the assumptions your church doesn't know it's making.
============================= Table of Contents: ============================= 0:00 - Intro 0:49 - The Asymmetrical Report - 91% vs 46% 6:05 - 1. The "Normal Family" Is Now the Minority 7:49 - 2. Pastors Live in a Different Reality 12:27 - 3. We Want Their Labor More Than Their Lives 14:25 - 4. Adulthood No Longer Follows a Tidy Timeline 19:58 - Exercise 1 - Audit Ten Sermons 27:00 - Exercise 2 - Test Six Real People 29:33 - Final Thoughts
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ALL CITATIONS BARNA GROUP - "2025 Family Trends" (2025) — PRIMARY https://www.barna.com/research/2025-family-trends/ - "Pastors and Today's Families" — PRIMARY https://www.barna.com/trends/pastors-and-todays-families/
U.S. CENSUS BUREAU - "Families and Living Arrangements" (2025) — PRIMARY https://www.census.gov/newsroom/press-releases/2025/families-and-living-arrangements.html - "Milestones to Adulthood" (August 2025) — PRIMARY https://www.census.gov/library/stories/2025/08/milestones-to-adulthood.html
LIFEWAY RESEARCH - "Pastors Minister to Single Adults, Some Provide Specific Ministries for Them" (August 2022) — PRIMARY https://research.lifeway.com/2022/08/16/pastors-minister-to-single-adults-some-provide-specific-ministries-for-them/
PEW RESEARCH CENTER - Adults living without a spouse or partner (2023 data) — study not specified in script
ABOUT ME Well hey there! I'm Brady Shearer, the creator and director of Pro Church Tools. I started this channel more than 10 years ago. Today our company is a team of 30+ creatives dedicated to helping your church navigate the biggest communication shift in 500 years.